IWR Bush Cartoon – Kerry Explains Election Loss – Feng Shui

John Kerry – Parody News Cartoon

Kerry Explains Election Loss

Washington (IWR News Parody) – Last night on Hard Ball, Senator John Kerry explained to host Chris Matthews why Kerry thought he lost the 2004 election.

Kerry said it was obvious that the Fates plotted against him.

"My Feng Shui was way out of kilter, and worst of all according to my Chinese astrologer, it was the Year of the Monkey!

In retrospect, how could anybody expect to beat Bush in a year favoring goddamn monkeys," said Mr. Kerry.

Chris Matthews then asked Kerry 137 questions in three minutes cutting off Kerry before he could answer a single one.

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Internet Weekly Report First Issued on 12/15/2001,

Copyright Internet Weekly Report 2001-2005.

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