WASHINGTON (IWR Parody News) – The House Ethics Committee today took action against the brazen graft and corruption of Republican House Whip Tom DeLay.
The committee ruled that Mr. DeLay will have to work weekends for the next 625 years to repay the the millions of dollars that he and his cronies have received in illegal contributions.
Since the Republicans have came to power, Washington has become infested with bloodsuckers, weasels and cockroaches, and Delay will work free of charge as a pest exterminator for the government until his debt to society is paid.
Despite the fact that Mr. "Orkin Man" DeLay smells like a slop jar, President Bush said he fully supported the unethical behavior of his fellow Texan.
"Come on, that’s what politics is about.
Nobody would go through the nosebleed of running for office and the humiliation of kissing every goddamn lobbyist’s ass in town if we thought there wasn’t a pot of gold waiting for us at the end of the line," said Mr. Bush.
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Internet Weekly Report First Issued on 12/15/2001, Copyright Internet Weekly Report 2001-2005.