MORGANTOWN, WV (IWR News Satire) – President George W. Bush was attacked by flock of angry penguins following his Independence Day message on climate change while visiting West Virginia University in Morgantown, West Virginia, July 4, 2005.
The penguins, which were part of a promotion for the March of the Penguins movie, attacked Bush after he said that he would not support a Kyoto style agreement on global warming.
Although Mr. Bush acknowledged that some of global warming was caused by human activity, he blamed the majority of the problem on "smelly, dirty animals like penguins, sea otters and capybaras".
Mr. Bush, who is known to have a severe bird phobia since childhood, fainted and then regained consciousness later after being treated with smelling salts.
Bush was then carried off on stretcher while sobbing and asking for his teddy bear until he was sped off in an ambulance.
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Internet Weekly Report First Issued on 12/15/2001, Copyright Internet Weekly Report 2001-2005.