BOULDER, CO (IWR News Parody) – Spokesperson for Beyonce, Connie Toaster-Oven, this morning said that the Grammy award winning singer was in stable condition at the Boulder Community Hospital after contracting pneumonia at her concert last night in Boulder.
"Beyonce says that she should have know better and worn a parka, but ‘they don’t pay me just to sing now do they?’, and I told her that they don’t pay you to turn into a Josephine Baker flavored Popsicle either", said Ms. Toaster-Oven.
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Internet Weekly Report First Issued on 12/15/2001, Copyright Internet Weekly Report 2001-2004.