WILKES-BARRE, PA (IWR News Parody) – President Bush today attempted to regain the momentum he lost in his confrontation with John Kerry by having another debate. To improve his odds this time, Mr. Bush decided that he would debate himself figuring that he would have a better chance to win in that match-up.
Unfortunately for the President, a Flash ABC poll found that Mr. Bush lost to himself by 75% to 18% margin. Surprisingly, 7% of the those polled thought Ralph Nader had won.
The debate ran shorter than the 90 minutes allotted because Mr. Bush turned off his own microphone. "If Bill O’Reilly can do it when he hears someone tell the truth, then, the President of the United States should be able to turn off his opponent’s mike in a debate too," said Mr. Bush as he stomped off the stage.
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Internet Weekly Report First Issued on 12/15/2001, Copyright Internet Weekly Report 2001-2004.