IWR Photo Cartoon – First Lady Laura "Pickles" Bush
The Golden Rule of Crony Capitalism
CHELSEA, MA (IWR News Parody) – First Lady Laura Bush teaches the students of George F. Kelly Elementary School in Chelsea, MA the ‘Golden Rule of Crony Capitalism’.
Here is an excerpt from the discussion:
Laura Bush: Now kids what is the big lesson that y’all should have learned from this here Enron scandal? Why don’t you tell us Tommy?
Tommy: That honesty is the best policy?
Laura Bush: [Chuckles] Yer so funny Tommy. If my husband George did that sort of thing, they would have impeached him last year. The last thing you want to do is tell the truth or admit you made a mistake or something! Now come one of you smart little kids has got to know the answer. Suzie what do you think?
Suzie: That you should always love your neighbor?
Laura Bush: [Laughs with that silly Texas cackle] Golly, I’m starting to feel like Art Linkletter in drag up hear. Oops. I better be careful. I don’t want to get into trouble like that Riordan guy in California. Ha, ha.
OK, kids now write this down, cause I’m only going to say it once: the Golden Rule of Crony Capitalism is to not get caught, like Kenny Boy and Tom Delay did, in the first place!
Now where can I go to smoke a couple of these here cigarettes?
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Internet Weekly Report First Issued on 12/15/2001, Copyright Internet Weekly Report 2001-2004.