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Bush Starts His "I'm OK - Iraq's OK" PR Offensive

PORTSMOUTH, NH (IWR Satire) -- In an effort to stem rising criticism and turn his sagging poll numbers around, President Bush today took what he called his "I'm OK - Iraq's OK" PR Offensive on the road to Portsmouth, NH.

"Good Morning.

When I stood on the deck of the USS Abraham Lincoln and proudly displayed my flight suit codpiece stuffed with Jenna's old bobby socks, I said that the war was over, and I meant it.

Well sort of, anyway. 

It was really was what Karl calls a president's poetic license.  You know like when I used it in my State of the Union speech about nucular yellow cake, WMD, or my countless phony inferences linking Saddam Hussein and 9/11.

Anyway, despite the fact that hundreds of  soldiers and civilians have died or been injured in acts of violence since May, I want to assure the American people that everything is really just peachy keen in Iraq.

Heck, the Iraqi people love us at least as much as they duz Israel, and that's the gospel truth!

The Iraqi's even have a cute nickname for our occupation forces - 'infidel bastards'!

See they just love us over there!  That's why we only need 87 billion dollars to keep them happy!

So next time, don't listen to those smart-aleck naysayers from that news Filter at ABC, CBS, or NBC.

If you really want your news slanted, just point your browser to whitehouse.gov, listen to my radio broadcasts or watch Fox News where you'll always hear that I'm OK and Iraq's OK.  Thank you," said Mr. Bush.


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Internet Weekly Report First Issued on 12/15/2001,
Copyright Internet Weekly Report 2001-2003.

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