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Official Richard Perle GOP Most Wanted Playing Card


Night of the Living Neocons

Richard Perle Sues O'Reilly Computer Books

Dr. Strangelove and said Camel Book.

WASHINGTON (IWR Satire) - Richard Perle, the influential foreign policy chickenhawk, is suing O'Reilly Computer Books for unauthorized use of his name for the Programming Perl book.  Mr. Perle is also suing for defamation of character by having his good name associated with the image of a camel and also by implying that Mr. Perle can be programmed by some scripting language to use his position as a Pentagon adviser to benefit financially from a war to liberate Iraq.

Mr. Perle said he is suing in Britain because it is easier to win frivolous cases there.

When asked what part of the Programming Perl or the so-called Camel book is incorrect, Mr. Perle told IWR: "Itís all lies, from beginning to end.  I cannot be controlled or programmed like the authors state.  It takes large sums of money to get my attention, and you can't write a Perl module to that!"

Larry Wall, one of the authors of the book in question, said he took issue with Mr. Perleís description of the Programming Perl authors on CNN Sunday as "the closest thing American journalism has to terrorists."

"I would have thought after all this many years, Mr. Perle would be a bit more refined than that and besides that I wish he could spell 'Perl' correctly," Mr. Wall said.

A former deputy undersecretary of defense who allegedly worked with Mr. Perle, Stephen Bryen, defended Mr. Perle.

"Itís pretty outrageous for a leftwing terrorist programmer to make associations or match patterns like this with no factual basis. Most of the many hours he works each day are pro bono to help the administration with its policy on Iraq. What he should get is a medal of honor, not some stinking Camel book, which defames his good character," said Mr. Bryen.

Richard Perle to Receive Special Academy Award

Richard Perle

Hollywood (IWR Satire) - The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences announced today that Richard Perle will receive a special Oscar for his role as a zombie extra in the 1968 horror film Night of the Living Dead.

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Internet Weekly Report First Issued on 12/15/2001,
Copyright Internet Weekly Report 2001-2003.

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