CAMBRIDGE (IWR Satire) -
A study conducted by scientists at MIT found that, in general,
Republicans have much longer noses than their Democratic counterparts.
They said this was do to a "Pinocchio Effect" caused by members of the
GOP telling a higher frequency of untruths than average Americans.
According to lead scientist, Heirlooom Tomotso: "It's not that
Independents or Democrats don't lie; the problem with Republicans is
that they believe their own lies after they make them up causing them
to lie with impunity. This makes their noses to grow unaturally
long as predicted by Darwin's law of nasal selection".