George W. Bush - Parody News Cartoon


Bush Calls Telling The Truth A Shameful Act

WASHINGTON (IWR News Satire) - President Bush today said that the NY Times report telling the truth about his secret unconstitutional Spygate program was a shameful act.

"Looky here, you media bastards, I thought we had a deal that I could run this country like El Duce after 9/11, and you all promised to play along by assigning friendly reporters to cover me like Brit Hume, Wolf Blitzer, Judy Miller and Bob Woodward.

Hell, we're all paid by the same corporate lobbyists, ain't we?

Remember when I invaded Poland, I mean Iraq? 

Nobody raised a single goddamn question about my decision to launch that immoral pre-emptive war back then.

Why didn't anyone tell the truth then?

What happened?

I'll tell you what happened. I went down in the polls like Monika Lewinsky.  That's what happened.  You used to be afraid on me because I was King Shit back then, and now you smell blood in the water.

For Christ sakes, what happened to your product loyalty that my corporate benefactors bought and paid for? 

Think on it. 

If we started telling the truth all the time, the stock market would collapse!

People would start buying products and services because of the real value instead of some commercial slogan aimed at hitting their reptilian hot buttons to buy some schlocky merchandise or enlist in the army!

Next thing you know an honest person with integrity would get elected president!  Heh. Heh.

So you see, the truth is the enemy of both the State and Madison Avenue!

Remember what Abe Lincoln said: 'If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it.'.

Or maybe it was Karl who said that," said Bush to a room full of ventriloquist dummies.

<Discuss>

 

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Internet Weekly Report First Issued on 12/15/2001,
Copyright Internet Weekly Report 2001-2005.



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